The Truth of Man

A woman should never say yes to a man or give him the opportunity to have cable television.

Chasing Change

A new car. A new apartment. The same receding lifestyle. I'm not sure if its the days or the nights that make my brain haemmorrhage. We return to the former with our practiced facades, and to the latter with our indifferent existences; all lying horizontally above or beneath each other, alternating with every other day as power struggles surge and fall with each persons horoscope perhaps. The television/ the internet has been like a parasite eating the inside of my brain. It doesn't matter if it's informative or not, I feel the audio/visuals boring holes in my head. Conversation and communication is as dead as a rotten cow in May. Change. How does one inject a shot of change into your bloodstream to cure this listlessness?

How to get more blog comments!

It's not easy.

I hate telling you that especially when you don't want to hear it but it's better you start reading this post of with the truth than some blog thats feeding you a bunch of baloney. It's obviously going to take alot of time because the more you time you send publicizing your blog, the more people will notice it.
1. Join all the group related to blog and put yourself out there. Here's a new one that will close after having 100 members so it's a smaller aggregator only meant for comments. http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=233819112286#/group.php?gid=233819112286

2. Follow up on what you have commented on. Try to find bloggers with common interests so you can be genuine in your comments. ubscribe to a notification for follow up comments so you let people know that you have read the replies to your comments.

3. Invite people to comment. Not everybody is facebook savvy. Sometimes they're more inclined to hide in the shadows unless you call them out. Triple dare them to post a comment.

If you really are in the mood to read I have accumulated data from various sites and put them on here:

Ask! – Ask for people to comment, you are more likely to get comments if you ask for them. Sometimes people do not know it is ok to comment. Just because there is a comment form does not mean people automatically feel worthy to post a comment. The higher the profile of the blog or the less the person feels they “know” the blogger the less likely they are to comment. By “giving permission” they will feel more entitled to comment.

This is by http://performancing.com/10-tips-for-attracting-more-comments/
Seed - Like a tip jar, people sometimes need a hint, get friends to comment to start the ball rolling and you might open the floodgates. On some blogs people like to be first, on others there is a hesitation period where they do not want to expose their opinion to early.

Ego - People like to talk about themselves, provide the opportunity. They might not be experts in the topic but we are all experts in our own experience and we all know what we like. You know the famous phrase about everyone having an opinion. Sometimes it is nice just to give people the opportunity to brag.

Links - Bloggers and webmasters are always on the lookout for link opportunities. They might not be your ideal kind of comment but they might encourage others that it is ok to feedback. Allow link drops in your blog comment settings and do not use nofollow so the link visibly has value.

Hint - Open questions are the best to get great quality answers, ie. “What do you think?”, but they can be intimidating. If you struggle to get comments it might be easier to give simple leading ideas for what people should say, eg. “Do you agree?”, “Are you for or against?”. “Yes, no, me too” are not great responses but at least they are a sign of life!

Restraint - Resist the urge to make your posts too complete if you want to receive community input. That’s one of the great things about top ten lists, you have to stop at 10! Don’t put everything into the post, especially if you know your audience has certain expertise they are bursting to share!

Usability - Sometimes people don’t comment just because they can’t! Make sure the comment form is obvious and easy to use. Also do not take the visitor to a different site in order to comment. The very worst culprits for this are the hosted services that not only take you to another site, they use a popup to do it. Why not inflict actual pain while you are at it?

Open - While a blog with a true membership is more valuable, if you are having difficulty getting comments open up your comment settings to allow comments with out registration. We can get away with requiring registration because we knew we would get the comments, consider carefully if your blog can get away with it too, many can’t.

Topic - If you want to attract comments then you have to pick your subjects. Some subjects people just do not have an opinion on, others you can’t stop people talking about. Current affairs are good but it needn’t be contraversial, politics and religion get people talking but can also send your blog down a path you might not want to go down. Press peoples buttons. You can endlessly recycle some topics, others are shortlived.

Observe - Note the topics people often comment on, there might be a trend. Just be observant. Be on the lookout for topics people comment on and write about them.

Getting a Schengen Visa in Kuwait

Yes, it does require a blog post.

Whoever invented Murphy's law is a bitch. Because I betcha it wasn't really around until somebody named it into existence. Now we know it exists and we go about anticipating it. Did you know there was a Finnagles law? "Anything that can go wrong, will—at the worst possible moment" He just had to add the last bit to it, didn't he?

Its like all those psychological disorders that exist out there, at any one given time we are bound to have at least one of them aren't we? With their generic characteristics, it is an easy excuse for the lazy and a nightmare for hypochondriacs I would assume? With all the discoveries of illnesses they can take their pick of what to freak out about really.

I Smell heaploads of Procrastination

You know what the recession is actually doing? It's making you lazier. Okay, not you, per se, but all of my friends who don't really read my blog. It's that attitude that nobody else is working, why should we work?

I think working used to be inherent in our bones. Now, we won't directly associate starving with working like the cavemen did, so we don't feel that need innately anymore. I can't imagine an ancient caveman, lets call him Fred, who would sit around pretending to work while he got weaker and weaker. What would Fred do to pass his time instead of hunting? Would he observe ants? Sit at a mountain top and daydream? Imitate Tarzan and swing from Banyan trees? I don't knwo why I needed to give Fred a name, but I do often wonder how much procrastination has increased in the modern world. And what it could get too. Somethings been on my mind alot lately, and it's applying to every aspect of life- People only change in times of utter desperation, when they are on the brink of collapse..............

Glossary of Last Moment Gifts in Kuwait

Every year, just before my birthday I pretend to not care about who is going to get me what. I don't think my act is very convincing at all, because I try to subtly hurl little suggestions about how I need to be surprised with something I never knew I needed. Then, I'll leave them stupefied of course without the slightest clue of what could possibly make me happy, and my inner smirk will still expect a gift. It's not that I don't, I'm a mighty gift giver myself. I actually put aside money for gifts for each month, so that when I need to go get it, my jaw doesn't drop and anchor itself to the ground in protest. So, here are great bets that would work for not so great a sum of moolah.

I just received the most beautiful Swarovski pendant on a leather string from a dear friend yesterday. It's the most simple yet the most elegant gift, and I'm loving it. The first gift of the year, and the best. Cost: Around 17 KD. Location: Swarovski at Marina or Avenues

An IPOD shuffle was what my bro in law gave me two birthdays ago. It was a fantastic present to clip on my pocket when I want for a walk, and it was simple yet elegant, technology in moderation is what I've always wanted. And this little baby is perfect. 1 GB, which is honestly not bad and will give you at least 2 days battery depending on how much you use it. Cost: About 30 KD. Location: Alghanim X-cite in Marina or Salmiya.

If you happen to know whether the person has a Wii or a PS3, you can pick up a game or two. I recently picked up a Call of Duty game for the PS3 . Cost 25 KD

Another quick yet thoughtful gift is a photoframe with a thoughtful picture you can up. Slip it onto a USB and beg the guys at Boushairi, Salmiya to print it for you super fast. If you're lucky they'll do it in 10 minutes like they did for me, otherwise getting it in an hour isnt that bad either. Cost 1.100 KD

My brother in law is amazing with gifts. They are always carefully thought of, all about the utility and once you receive it you wonder how you lived without it. He gave me a 320 GB hard drive for last Christmas loaded with a couple of seasons of Lost, all of House, some of Chuck and a bunch load of movies! It's fantastic because it's one of those that you connect directly to the TV to play it. Cost: I'm not sure about this one but Alghanim does have some fab hard drive's that double up and do more than the usual, check 'em out yourself until I figure this out better and update this post heh!

Women aren't that difficult usually as there's always perfumes, chocolates or even flowers. But if you are in a relationship and want to be a step above your game, you'll get those on days that are no occasion at all. Also remember that quantity is everything. We have this random superficial need that makes us want to belt out the amount of gifts you have given us in more than one breath no matter how insignificant it is. Yea. Well, my birthday is in about 20 days. I'll update you with what I get. If you have any ideas, just share it already!

21 days in Europe

So two months of not posting! Don't ostracize me! I have lots of funny stories about my boss, and I'll trade inside stories about my family for your attention! I'll spruce up my love life just for the sake of content! I'll think in blog title format!!!!!!! Come back! Ha. Did that work? I didn't mean it.

Anyway, our Eurotrip plans had a journey of their own. Last year, we impulsively decided we would drive from Kuwait to Europe. Four people were on then. The plan faded and backed into a shadowy corner and life went on and the excitement waned. About a month ago, 5 of us booked tickets. We'd fly to Germany and then prance about in Amsterdam before going to France to recuperate. Now with the swine flu and job situations, it seems like its boiled down to two of us actually going through with it. I'm still hoping the other three change their mind or I'll have no one to drink with.

So right now, I'm thinking Germany from the 11th to the 21st and then France. The only thing we know is that we will land in Frankfurt and have accomodation there. The rest is my oyster! Any advice? Also, anyone have any advice for some cheap paying-guest-house or anything?

Adobe Illustration: Some Effects on a Sketch

I know I've disappeared for a while, but it was because I had an MBA exam I needed to study. I didn't even finish that because I was researching alot of online games for a good blog post. Unfortunately, I got very addicted and very lost with those games. I might just be back, but I'm not sure yet.
By the way, would you believe there isn't a single freaking proper Yoga instructor here? Everyone who practices it here seems to have forgotten it isn't only about the body but also about the mind. Spastics! I wish I knew earlier to pursue a career in it!

A Shopaholics Solution

We just found out this morning that the price of redbull has increased from .500 fils to .750 fils. Pangs of guilt immediately shot up from my feet that were precariously perched on the new 17KD stilettos I picked up yesterday. I was definitely the only one at Marina mall yesterday who owned more bags than I could carry. I spent 101.500 K.D (350$) at H&M on 3 pairs of shoes, three blouses, two brightly coloured chillax (so chilled out + relaxed bottoms that they are) pants, a gorgeous A-Line skirt, 10 pairs of socks, two belts and some bangles. (More pictures coming up later) It felt really good until I received the sms alert I subscribed for that tells me if there's any action on my debit card. Ouch, when I realized my balance. It's not bad, but I still need to do a Euro Trip and I'm trying to work my way into getting some more days off by catching up with a client in Egypt.

I know that I cant go cold turkey off shopping for long, but I haven't yet discovered anything else that gives me the satisfaction like the materliastic superficiality of new clothes! So, I'm going to act on an impulse. Actually it's not an impulse as I've been sitting on this idea for a very long time. I'm going to send a fashionista friend I once modelled with a bunch of pictures from my wardrobe from shoes to belts to accessories so she knows what I have/like, my measurements and some money. She lives in Mumbai, India and I know that for 101.500 KD, I would get double the amount of stuff and twice as interesting as well. I know a better solution would be to just shut it and stop spending, but hey, you can't stay so depressed and deprive your self of new things in these glum times. Sometimes its novelty that keeps us buoyant and distracted and encouraged, you know? God forbid I loose my job, but hoping that doesn't happen I think it's just time to cut down and slash the budget than cease and desist altogether.

The perfect Gift for a Woman

Some people buy you what they want for themselves as a gift for you. Projected wants and needs, I guess. A few people painstakingly rummage through your emails and desks or drawers and wardrobe to figure out what you don't have but really need. A few others actually pay attention to the small details about you, and remember what you say and don't forget for that silly wish you made for something really cheap that one time. Some buy you nothing. I have to buy gifts for three women, two birthdays and one goodbye, and I didn't have the faintest clue. I just came across this page and I think I can no longer be categorized in any of the above.

Please note that my title is completely and utterly sarcastic and if you do actually buy this, you're just plain stupid. What the .....!

I used to write like she did. My thoughts would twist and turn, and come forth in beautiful tangles of threads, each of different colours. Colours that are hard to find on Microsoft Paint. Maybe on Adobe Illustrator, you'll find them. My mind would stray to the stars, skip through galaxies, plummet back to earth and bounce across continents. It would plop into an ocean and sink deep, complacently watching every movement in the dark depths for eons. Simultaneously it would be in another dimension, the dimension of everyday that spews up a gurgling lava flow of observations. Each with their own stories and jigsaw puzzle shaped situations. I'd play with words, and eat them, and sleep with them, and rape them, and put them on a pedestal, and inject them with each other, and that would leave me high.

What changed?

Maybe if I use this font it'll come back to me? Maybe if I have a different canvas instead of this computer screen to transmit my thought s to? Maybe my synapses are connected to my fingers which don't feel the same way about the keyboard as they did about my pencils. Maybe this corporate world has fizzled out my soul.

I used to blog before. Jitterbug, I used to call myself. It meant nothing. I wrote my heart out and showed it to someone I trusted. Your sentences are too long and winding. Your tone is so sad, you lament, unlike the happy person you are otherwise. What you read won't make google like you any more, you never even title your posts sometimes.

But friend, I think now, that was more me than I'll ever be. Writing for me was a bridge from my heart to the world, and you put some nasty stink bombs on it. I didn't care if the world saw me, I didn't care if I made money out of it, I didn't care what I came across. It was the one place that I could be me, in this world where we need to have a facebook account to stay a part of the clan; or have the smallest cellphone so it gives the right image to the job title scribbled on our visiting card, where we precariously balance our lives on stilletos and drive SUVs to look down from our high horses. It was home.

I used to write like she did. My words contoured around corners, and tapered at the end. They lingered and they weighed you down. They danced sometimes, and paragraphs looked like pictures. They were my words, all mine, with their little dots and corners and slants.

The Consequences of Boredom.

I like Adobe Illustrator. Now lets see what word is killing the cartoon people!

LazY BunnY

Since I'm a lazy bunny, I thought I'd write a post that had nothing to do with what the title implied it would be. What I am going to do instead is upload a video from my recent gallavant to Jordan. We rented a car, and since I would only ride shotgun, I was designated as the navigator/ map reader as well. I maintain till my second last breath that that map was jacked. We did manage to find the places we wanted to get to eventually, though I do believe its much more adventurous getting lost and seeing the real bits of the country. Yes, even if it means reaching a suspicious looking dead end with strange looking men in uniforms brandishing swords over a bonfire with evil grins on their faces. Good thing that didnt happen to us of course, but it would've taught 'em to do the navigation, aye? This video does not consist of anything marvellous- no ruins, no landscape, no me, no car chase, no bird falling from the sky onto the windscreen. It's just a drive. Enjoy the music. :-D

Virtual Doppelganger

Curious people that we are, we have all googled our names once in a while. two years ago or so, I was looking for something, some ember of the shadow of my past even. Something to savour and a memory to snuggle into. The webs ability to transport me into the warmth of yesteryear was comforting at that point.

I put my name on and saw a few links that were relevant. Not enough. Not enough by six and a half dozen yards. I investigated all the links, every hyperlink and every picture, relishing every flashback. At the bottom of the page, I saw a link with my name, and a blog domain. What? The summary sounded like me, though I had no memory of writing it at all!

I clicked onto it, and saw the picture, it wasn't me but a young woman of about my age. I read her description and the rage surged volcanically through my bloodstream as I found that everything that was put in there, were excerpts from my resume. Word for word, from the about me to education, languages known, interests, where I lived, the other certificates I had. I was stumped and wanted to wrong off someone's head. I didn't care who. I proceeded to read the blog which had half a dozen posts which seemed to have abruptly stopped a year ago. The stories were not mine, neither did the impersonator mimick my style well. But they didn't have to, they had a flair for capturing what could have been my life very easily. The stories sounded like they would've fit my personality, except for the taste in some songs and phrases. Those were just plain blech. I can't remember how I forgot about it that day. I was paranoid enough at a point to wonder if the gemini in me evolved a split personality to live another life. But that was not true. I had no idea who it was and don't think I'll ever know.

I left some nasty comments cussing the bitch/ asshole and eventually forgot about it as it was abandoned long before I discovered it, and I doubted I'd get a response. A few months later when someone admitted they'd found it when they searched my name some time ago, I went back to the site. There was just the profile, bu the blog was gone. The reason I'm bringing it up today, was because I was over at my sisters. I used to have an Orkut account and forgot the email address I signed up with and wanted to check if I had any new scraps since the last century. I hadn't added her as a friend, so I had to search me. Wanna guess who I find? Now once again, I'm livid and curious about who had the audacity and what were their reasons. My sister marvelled at the profile, some of which had the same details on that website and some which they had casually filled up on their own with general answers. The profile is still there on the blog domain. The wannabe me I'll never know.

Elevator

My office is on the top most floor of a one storey building. Yes, it's not that high up. Yet, the elevator; which is slower than rigor mortis; is surprisingly used more frequently than a hot yet cheap hooker. The car park and bathrooms are in the basement, though people use it to go one storey lower as well. I have, for the fun of it, raced it to find that I am thrice as fast in my sneakers and one and a half times as fast in my heels.

So today as I get out of my office to go to the bathroom, after prolonging the need to for very long on account of reading all of your blogs, I curse my luck to see that the chick from the neighbouring office is also heading towards the elevator. Shit, I think, no chicken dance in the elevator to control my bladder. The chicken dance is an intricately concocted dance of marching within the elevator in a circle while lifting my feet high with each step. I hope to God there isnt a camera in the elevator. No there isn't. I looked carefully when I was striking poses in the giant mirror they have in it. Yellow elevator light and Giant mirrors just make you look amazing.

I survive, despite the fact that she stands right in front of the button thinking she's pressed it, but hadn't. I resist socking her face while reaching for it but politely gesture. It was funny though, as we hit the bottom floor, she tried to hop off to the bathroom as gracefully as one can muster a hop! I burst out laughing much to the poor chics discomfort, and she refused to look me in the eye for a whole week. Funny shit, you know?

P.S I iz off to the neighbouring city of Amman tomorrow for a weekend of bliss! I will see you bloggers and bloggerettes Saturday! :-)

Lexulous Blitz

I actually found a youtube video online for you all. For those of you who like lexulous, you will love the Blitzy version of it.



Here's the lowdown on it .
The Blitz version takes Lexulous to an all new level! Blitz is exactly the same as regular Lexulous, except that you have the entire board to yourself. You compete with up to 150 people in rounds lasting 4 minutes each.
All players start the round with the same 7 tiles, and then it is up to them to make full use of the 4 minutes to get the maximum number of points. Whoever scores most before the time / tiles run out, wins the round. Results for all the players in the round are shown instantly and the next round begins after a 1 minute break.
If you play Blitz it is highly recommended that you use the keyboard to place the tiles rather than drag them one by one using the mouse. Simple (sic) click on the board and a black arrow will appear. Then type the tiles you have in your rack to place them on the board. Clicking twice will make the arrow point vertically.
I know people been using it since late last year, but I just discovered it. This is meant for any of you, who are the last to find out about everything just like me. Let's see if you can finish all your tiles in 4 minutes!

Pekingese Power

The one thing I like about living in this desert is that I have the keys to three different houses. I pay rent to just one, of course. The one I'm plonked at tonight has got the cutest pekingese you have ever seen. It looks very daft actually, but you know how some daft things look cute. Like how something really ugly just nullifies its own repulsiveness.
So Flatface and me had a stand off earlier. I think its the only stand off that ever happened with one contender trying desperately to suppress a volley of laughter. He wouldn't finish up his dinner and I wouldn't let him budge from there to where he desperately wanted to go. Don't ask me where he desperately wanted to go. I mean, we humans move with direction in our houses to a few particular places- the couch, the fridge and the bathroom. Other places we kind of roll towards. Well, so I just stood in front of his tiny staunchness and he glared angrily at my feet. Its the cutest thing when an animal musters up all of his emotion into his little face. He looks up at me with this angry little sulk, sees me with my most hilarious grin on and his entire demeanour changes I tell you! He kind of smiles (a smile looks weirder on a pekingnese than on any other dog, I tell you) and then sits right there and keeps looking at me... probably trying to say 'lets see who can do this longer'. I gave up obviously, as I heard one of Discovery's Evolution programs coming on and wanted to figure out where little pekingnese smarty pants came from. I know he's plotting his vengeance for the fact that I'm making him finish his dinner, it's going to be a rude sloppy pekingese breath awakening tomorrow morning.

I know you all know this song, but it's worth reminding you of.

Vertical Scrabble

Or should I say vertical Lexulous? Some random stranger seemed to be up for my impulsive madness, and allowed his grey cells to challenge wordly gravity

For Braja

I went to blognuts page to play catch up, only to find out that one of our well-loved bloggers Braja met with an accident with her husband a few days ago. I'm not the prayer type, but I do believe in positive energies doing their job. Her last post has been receiving loads of love from all of her readers, where she had written about her impending trip to Bangkok though she did not make it to the airport. She is getting better and updates about her are here http://www.prabhupada.org/rama/?p=4422.

Get well soon Braja and hubby!